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Posts tagged under Home. Show all posts.
Last year we bought a little house on a large lot in a neighbourhood we loved. We gutted it, adding two floors and digging out the basement. The whole job took eight months. My husband, our five kids, our dog and me lived in the house the whole time.
It was one wild adventure. It made us a better family and I think it made me a better person. I learned a lot about parenting, about marriage, and about kids while living in the reno zone.
There were good reasons to stay in the house. For one thing, there were no houses to rent in the area and no apartment could house our brood. We wanted the kids to settle into the neighbourhood. We wanted them to stay at their school. Despite the mayhem around them, we wanted them to continue on with all their normal activities.
Oops. I used the word “normal”. Looking back on it from the comfortable confines of my renovated house, I think the biggest lessons I learned from this adventure had to do with the words normal and change.
While living in the reno zone, we chose to recognize and embrace change. The kids, who slept on single mattresses stuck together like Scrabble pieces, knew things were different. Why hide it? There was no TV, no computer, only books and board games surrounded by tools and materials. The kids, all powerfully driven by the pursuit of fun, adapted immediately. (It took my husband a little longer.)
I learned that some things shouldn’t change. We ate every meal together, sitting around the dinner table each night reviewing our days. By the way, an unplugged table saw makes for an excellent sideboard. Bedtime is bedtime, homework is homework, and the dog needs to be walked.
By keeping the basic structure of family life together, I realized that home is simply any place where we are all living together. It was rather liberating. This is probably the best reason why living in the reno zone felt so normal.
The first year I met my husband, we had a tomato-growing contest. We spent one lovely spring morning in his backyard, scratching in the earth and planting our seeds (surprisingly romantic). The sprouts took on a symbolic meaning and I poured my energies each weekend into nurturing, weeding, and fertilizing.
He ignored them and watched football most weekends
His tomatoes, planted in a nice spot exposed to sun and rain, were left alone. He checked in on them regularly, making sure they were safe, but not interfering with nature. My tomatoes, flooded with love and nurture, all primped and preened and spoiled rotten, were lousy. His were amazing.
The renovation made me think about the tomatoes because for kids and tomatoes, there is some magic balance between nurture and neglect. (I realize neglect is the wrong word—it sounds ugly but I think that is why I like using it.) Put it this way: there is a fine line between mothering and smothering.
It takes courage to leave your kids alone—more courage than I usually have. If they know they are loved, it’s often the right thing to do. I thank the renovation for forcing me to let the kids fend for themselves more than I otherwise would.
The greatest challenge of parenting is allowing kids to develop self-reliance and independence while knowing they are loved and supported.
I was busy through the renovation and had less hands-on time with the kids. I missed them. It made me really focus on improving the quality of my time with the kids. I made sure it was intense, fun and loving.
The rest of the time they were left to their own devices. Lo and behold, the older two became attentive shepherds to their younger siblings. They developed a whole bunch of games that all five of them could play. They became better friends. The middle boy, following the lead of his older siblings, became a voracious leader. The five year old learned to ride her bike and now explores the neighbourhood on wheels.
I am really proud of them. There is a part of me that thinks if I had had more time last year, they might not be doing as well. Like my husband’s tomatoes, they got just the right amount of love and sunshine—all on their own.
Label Your Life
Let’s be clear from the get-go: I have six kids and I am the co-founder of Mabel’s Labels Inc. Clearly, labelling is a huge part of my life and essential for keeping me organized. In fact, the thought of not being organized makes me shudder.
Recently, I had a chat with our Customer Service guru, Martha at Mabel’s HQ to get her frontline opinions about some of the creative ways our customers stay organized with labels. All I can say is…WOW, I am inspired! Indeed, it appears we are providing labels for some pretty clever mamas!
The Snow Day
Moms are finding wicker baskets great for all the kids’ hats, scarves and mittens. Give each kid a basket, attach a personalized tag like our Bag Tag to the basket handle and call it home for all their snow paraphernalia.
Off the Hook
Pop a label like one of our Sticky Labels above each child’s coat hook. Each coat should then be able to find its way back to where it belongs. No excuses—labels don’t lie.
The Spice Girls
Try our custom Canister/Spice Labels for your spice jars and kitchen canisters to keep tabs on everything. Small labels like this are so versatile you can also personalize them for video games, cosmetics, craft paints and supplies, DVDs, book plates, etc.
The “I’m Addicted to Rubbermaid Totes” Mama
For the woman who locks it all away in handy plastic totes, but can only find the Christmas tree garland when she needs Easter Eggs—label the totes after each holiday with what is inside (Custom Bin Labels are your answer and at the end of the year you’ll be back on track with all the holiday paraphernalia!
The “If I Lend You this Book, Will I Get It Back?” Dilemma
Label those books with your name and phone number to ensure they make it back to your bookshelf.
The Litterless Lunch
Line ‘em up and start slinging sandwiches. Put small labels on the food containers, the thermos, cutlery, etc. These little labels will ensure all your lunch bag components make it home, while also guaranteeing the right lunch finds a home in the right stomach.
The Monster Under the Desk
If your computer and electronic cords are looking more like an angry octopus, get some cord control by labelling these as well. No more guessing whether you’ve unplugged the phone or the PVR.
The Costco Creeper
Buy in bulk? Can’t lift your 40lb tub of shampoo or family-sized barrel of pickles. Downsize to smaller containers and label!
What’s your best label hack? Tell us how you use labels in your life and enter for your chance to win some Mabel’s Labels. Here’s how:
For the next week, each time you post a comment with a labelling tip, you will be entered to win one of three prizes courtesy of Mabel’s Labels. We have two Big Combo packages and one set of Mama Cards to give-away. The more comments you leave in response to this post, the more chances you have to win! (Click here for contest rules and regulations.)
Big Combo Package
Mama Cards
In honour of Earth Day, I have some simple suggestions on how to ‘green’ your home and improve your family’s overall health.
Still rocking the Teflon, non-stick pan set from your wedding registry? Stainless steel, cast iron, and the latest in earth-friendly cookware are a better alternative. The ‘King of Non-Stick’, Teflon, is produced with highly toxic chemicals that are a likely human carcinogen. While on the topic, avoid using the self-clean option on your oven because these ovens are lined with non-stick services that emit toxic fumes during the ‘cleaning’ process.
Avoid using chemicals to mask odours. Room deodorizers (or plug-ins) are the worst culprits for spritzing chemicals around a room. Instead, open your windows and let the sunshine and fresh air into your home. Sunlight is a natural killer of bacteria. Fresh air and plants will also remove odour, improve air quality, and save you money!
There’s no need for fabric softeners and dryer sheets. Dryer sheets provide a double whammy of skin irritation and airborne toxins for your family to ingest. Walk around your neighborhood on a beautiful, clear morning and you’ll smell the homes that are using dryer sheets from outside. Think of how high the chemical concentrate from those sheets must be if you can smell it in that context. There are healthier alternatives to keeping your clothes soft.
Start cleaning and laundering with eco-friendly cleaners. Not only will the fish thank you, but your health will improve, too. And your children can safely help you clean using a microfibre cloth or washing dishes with eco-friendly soap because the toxic ingredients are gone.
Being green definitely has its benefits.
The melting of winter into spring is a great time to bring order back into your home after the chaos that hibernation brings. Spring cleaning can be a daunting task, but you can simplify it by enlisting your family to help and make it into a fun activity. Here’s a step-by-step guide on how to pull it off.
- Pick a date when you can dedicate the whole day. Be sure to have the supplies you need, including handy snacks and drinks. Work in teams of two or three and then switch halfway through the day. Don’t forget to choose some up-tempo music to keep the energy levels intact.
- Tackle closets first. Tell the kids you’re having a fashion show and let them try on all of their clothes. What doesn’t fit gets handed down to a sibling, or packed into a box for donation.
- Find all the toys. Create a treasure hunt for younger children with an appropriate incentive to find all those extra pieces of Lego and Polly Pocket clothes. When their basket is full, have them pile the toys in the centre of the family room, then sort them into ‘keep’ and ‘part’ piles. For the ‘part’ pile, separate the toys into bins for garbage, donations, and a garage sale. Make sure to deliver these bins to their final destination, so that they do not clutter up your garage, or find their way back into the house!
- Sort through books. Locate all the books and spread them on the floor (parents’ books, too). Donate as many books as possible to a local daycare or charity and toss the ripped and damaged ones.
- Deal with the memorabilia. Keep arts, crafts and papers from school in one large storage bin and then have your kids sort through the bin, keeping only a quarter of the pile. Put a few special items out on display, and store the rest in a folder.
Finally, at the end of a productive day, reward your team with dinner out at a favourite restaurant. You won’t feel like cooking—or worse—cleaning up after the dinner mess!
While there are many advantages to working from home, there is no point unless you can find an appropriate space to do business without interruption. Here are some simple recommendations on how to run a successful home office and keep the peace at home.
- Take periodic coffee breaks to visit with your kids. Let them know ahead of time how many breaks you plan to take; two in the morning, one in the afternoon. Thank them (in your special way) for their patience.
- Set clear boundaries with your family. Understanding why you are not available even though you are home is very difficult, even for your spouse! To limit interruptions during an important call, prepare them beforehand, and set your expectations for the duration of the call.
- Dedicate ONE space in your home for an office. Even though sharing an office space is more common than not, my advice is to keep all of your files, resources, and supplies in one location. The only work item that should move about the house is your laptop.
- Keep personal papers separate from your business files. If you share your office space, chances are there is a pile of personal files, bank statements, and your teenager’s project notes cluttering the desktop. Define a function for each desk drawer, bookshelf cubby, and filing cabinet drawer. Clearly label these areas for quick access.
- Don’t hesitate to get help from friends or hire a part-time sitter. Organize one playdate each week with a friend and schedule those ‘quiet’ hours accordingly. Find out what days your teenage babysitter gets home early from school, or better yet, the days she/he has off. Why not pay a sitter for a few hours every month? While you focus on your work, the kids could be playing at the park down the street—a win-win solution for a minimal cost.
Fire Safety
Last week was fire prevention week, but I bet not many savvy moms knew about that. So I don’t mind telling you about it now—even though it’s over. The fact is that fire safety in the home is relevant any week. I also think it’s a great time of year to take stock on all systems in your home and be sure you are well prepared for the winter months ahead.
Here’s an article on establishing an escape plan and some reminders we received last week from Home Depot on making sure your house is safe are definitely worth noting.
- Set the alarm. Every level of the home should have a smoke alarm and they should be placed as close to the bedrooms as possible. When installing a smoke alarm, consider one operated with a sealed battery, as these can last up to 10 years. Test your alarms once a year and replace the batteries when needed.
- Prevent invisible threats. Install a carbon monoxide alarm on every floor and especially near bedrooms so you can be alerted if this gas is present. Look for the CSA 6.19-01 blue flame stamp to ensure they are certified to the latest technology. Like smoke alarms, carbon monoxide alarms need to be tested regularly. They should also be replaced every five to seven years.
- Check your chimney. Over time, soot from smoke and other particles can build up in the chimney causing smoke from fires to enter into the home. Make sure you have it inspected every fall and cleaned as necessary.
- Light it right. Examine all light fixtures and make sure the light bulbs meet the recommended wattage requirements for your lamps and lighting fixtures. The wattage should be indicated on the light fixture or in the instruction manual.
- Be emergency prepared. In case of small fires, a high-rated fire extinguisher is essential for every 600 feet of space in your home. There are three basic classes of fire extinguishers (A, B and C) that are effective at protecting against different types of fires, as well as multi-purpose extinguishers to protect against all three. Know how to operate and maintain your fire extinguishers and install them within reach and in an upright position.
Insomnia is the worst. Why is it that everything seems way scarier and more stressful in the middle of the night? Trying to turn those thoughts off can be impossible when you’re tossing and turning, viciously aware of the dwindling hours between you and the sound of the morning alarm.
According to a survey by website Manilla.com, the number one answer among women of “what keeps you up at night?” is financial worries. That’s right—30 percent of women said money stress is keeping them up at night.
Next to money, work stress and ‘to-do lists’ are the second-most common reasons for insomnia among women; 18 percent of women blamed these for keeping them awake.
Nothing keeps men awake
Interestingly (or perhaps frighteningly), the number one factor keeping men up at night is ‘nothing’—as cited by 35 percent of men. We presume this means these men are enjoying peaceful and untroubled sleep. Or perhaps ‘nothing’ means: “As if I would tell a survey what keeps me awake at night! Nothing scares me, of course!”
Organizing makes us happy
According to the survey, disorganization and clutter are driving more women crazy than men (surprise, surprise—not). In fact, 73 percent of women claim they are frustrated by household disorganization, 38 percent of women complain about the waste of paper mail and 32 percent complain of the clutter. By comparison, fewer men (59 percent) complain that they are similarly frustrated.
Apparently, 50 percent of women and 41 percent of men feel relaxed when they are organized. Indeed, 41 percent and 37 percent feel downright happy as a result. (We concur!)
Gender parity
Whether you are extremely organized…or not, one survey finding is none too surprising: half of women and half of men surveyed say they forgot to pay at least one bill over the past year. Uh oh…
Tips to quell the chaos
Here are a few ways you can get your household finances more organized:
- Pay bills by credit card – Most utility companies and service providers are all-too happy to take down your credit card information so they can automatically bill you each month. This means you don’t have to remember to pay them, but you must check your statements once a month to make sure nothing is amiss. (And don’t forget to pay your credit card bill on time and in full please!)
- Everything in its place – If you receive statements and bills via snail mail, make sure you immediately plop them into one consolidated filing spot—a drawer or folder solely for current bills. As you pay each bill, move it into a different folder specifically for paid bills and receipts—or recycle, or shred.
- Take a meeting – In a busy household, it’s important to sit down together once a month and compare notes on what got paid and what was owed on each bill. This helps a couple to communicate about money so you can both feel comfortable that the financial situation is under control. (It also helps you find out quickly if you both paid the phone bill this month!)
- Track it – Spreadsheets: you either love them or hate them, but they can simplify your life. Each month, jot down how much you paid for each bill in an ongoing spreadsheet. This helps you to compare month to month costs, so you can readily spot whether your phone bill is incrementally rising with the age of your teenage daughters.
Yoda and sleep
As Yoda said, “Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.” It’s usually an element of fear (and avoidance of fear) that leads you to toss unopened bills aside and not make them a priority. And then you get angry with yourself when you can’t find the bills, or forget to pay them and you end up paying more in late fees and credit card interest. Which in turn makes you hate the service provider. And you suffer by not sleeping at night, wondering which utility you forgot to pay. (It’s all so complicated!)
The solution: by keeping your finances organized and up to date, not only will you avoid the dark side (i.e. chaos and disorganization), you will have a much better chance of sleeping at night.
And with that—sleep tight!
Whether across the city or the globe, change can be scary for adults and children. These tips will set your family up for success.
- How do you feel? Children take their cues from their parents. If you feel anxious, scared or resentful, they will too. Work through your baggage. It will help everyone involved.
- Talk clearly. “Our family is moving to a new city!” rather than “How would you like to move to a new place?” If it’s not a choice, don’t pretend it is.
- Present age-appropriate facts. How will this directly affect them? “You will have a new room. We are taking your old bed and your stuffed animals. We will live really close to Grandma.”
- Accept all feelings. Don’t expect your kids to instantly love the idea. They may need time to adjust and might vary between excitement, fear and nervousness. Empathize with them: “Wow, sounds like you are feeling unsure about this – that’s pretty normal. Different people react differently to change. Take your time and ask me whatever questions you need to. Do you need a hug right now or do you want to think about this on your own for a while?” Just because your child feels one way right now, doesn’t mean it will be like that forever.
- Give control where you can. The kids can’t decide whether you are moving, but they might choose paint colour for their rooms, new towels for their bathroom or which books are coming with them from the old house.
- Thanks for the memories. Create a picture book of the old house, familiar places and old friends. You could also make a picture book of the new house so that it becomes known and predictable.
- The big day. Move your child’s bedding, stuffies and favourite books in your own vehicle if possible. That way, upon arrival, what’s needed for a familiar bed routine is easy to find.
Good luck!
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