Experts

Topic —  About Mom,

Keeping It All Together

July 11, 2010
Tamara Taggart

I’m just like every other parent—busy. We have two children, Beckett who is turning three soon and Zoë, almost two. I work full-time for CTV and I’m eight-months pregnant with baby number three. 

Although I believe that you can have it all, I also believe that some things have to be prioritized. I never go to after-work parties, restaurant openings, fashion shows, movies—all the events I went to before I had kids. I come straight home every single night because I want to put my kids to bed—and because I’m so freaking tired. I’m a natural homebody, so this is easy for me. 

I choose sleep over the gym. I’d rather be chubby and well-rested than skinny and tired. I have great support. My husband and I have weird hours, so we are lucky to have family close by. We also chose to have a nanny and put Beckett in part-time daycare because it has been instrumental in his growth. Beckett has Down syndrome, so anything we can do to encourage and nurture his development is a priority in our family. 

Some tips that help me find balance:

1. Focus on your priorities—be willing to say “no” if something isn’t on your list of priorities.
2. Get organized—much easier said than done! I spend a lot of time fantasizing about being organized.
3. Be flexible—which means to stop striving for perfection and be reasonable with your expectations.
4. Create daily routines—I didn’t believe in routines before I had kids, I do now!  Life is much smoother with a schedule.
5. Find support—be willing to ask for help and to receive it. Family, friends, neighbours, professionals—anyone!
6. Simplify your life—this is a tough one. Being busy doesn’t mean you’re important, it just means you’re busy and probably missing out on what’s really important.

Finding balance is truly a work in progress.

Topic —  About Mom,

Me and Down Syndrome

July 18, 2010
Tamara Taggart

Five days after our son Beckett was born, he was diagnosed with Trisomy 21, also known as Down syndrome. Those first few days were filled with sadness, fear and questions….the unknown is very frightening. Beckett is almost three now, and he’s healthy, loving, smart and kind. Everyone who meets him falls instantly in love. We knew nothing about Down syndrome but we quickly became experts, as did our family and friends. We didn’t know anyone with Down syndrome, now we know lots of people. Beckett changed a lot of things for us, all for the better.

Here are a few facts about Down syndrome:

• Individuals with Down syndrome have an extra #21 chromosome—the medical term is Trisomy 21.
• Children with Down syndrome have some physical, intellectual and emotional developmental delays.
• Children with Down syndrome may also have other medical conditions.
• Down syndrome is not related to race, religion or socio-economic status.
• Children with Down syndrome share more similarities than differences with other children. They learn, laugh, play and want friends, just like all children.
• Individuals with Down syndrome benefit from loving parents, early medical and educational attention and positive public attitudes.
• Children with Down syndrome have a full complement of emotions and attitudes, are creative and imaginative and grow up to live independent lives with varying degrees of support and accommodations needed.

Here are some things that really irritate me:

• Use of the word “retarded”, especially when used to insensitively describe something stupid.
• The term “Downs kids”—they are just children who happen to have Down syndrome.
• People who say: “They’re such happy people”. I’d like to think that my child being happy is because we love him, not because he has an extra chromosome.
• People who assume and don’t ask questions. Trust me, parents are more than happy to have a thoughtful discussion about their child.

We’re all vulnerable to challenges; no one is immune, no one lives a perfect life. My dreams for Beckett are the same dreams you have for your child. I want him to be happy and healthy—I want him to be everything he wants to be. When I look at Beckett and Zoë, I feel so much love and happiness. My children hold my heart—nothing makes me happier.