What’s for Dinner, Mom?

“What’s for dinner, Mom?” Something nasty you’re going to hate.
Is there any question more hated by moms than this? In my house, with four voices (five if you count my husband and eliminate the ‘Mom’ tag) constantly calling this out to me on a seemingly well-timed rotation from the minute they walk through the front door, I have narrowed my response to the following (learned through trial and error):

1. “Chicken, vegetable and potato”. (I mean, really, what else is there?) To which they respond:
   1. Again?
   2. The gross kind of chicken?
   3. Can I just eat my leftover lunch?
   4. What’s a potato?
2. “Leftover Buffet!” Their return volley:
   1. Is it that gross chicken again?
   2. Is there ketchup?
   3. ‘Leftover’ does not tell me anything, MOTHER.
   4. Can I go to Liam’s house? His Mom’s a good cook.
3. “I just got in. What do you think we should have?” (Why, oh why did I ever go there…)
   1. Something good for a change.
   2. Pizza. But not the gross kind YOU make.
   3. Why did you ask him? Why don’t I get to pick? (Whack) He sucks! MOM!
   4. You always ask that and then you always get to pick anyway. It’s not fair.
4. “Something nasty and you’re going to hate it.” (Really there can be no response to this as they all agree.)

So I’ve learned that, once again, as with Parent/Teacher interviews, just don’t ask the questions you really don’t want the answers to. Now what the hell should I make for dinner tonight? Oops, just did it again.