Having Children Helped Me Find My Ambition
When I was 22, pregnant, and newly-married I was laid off from my job, and surprisingly felt relieved. I had a difficult and traumatic experience with my employer, and decided that I would never work again.
I packed up my belongings and left my job without looking back. I was free to become what I really wanted to be: a doting full-time mother. I settled into my new role as a stay-at-home mom easily, I loved my new life and celebrated that I’d never step foot in an office ever again.
By the time I was 25 I was mother to two active little girls, and I had limited time to even think about my old life or career. I had zero desire to return to the workplace, but something inside of me was stirring, and I couldn’t identify what the unsettled feeling was.
I had always enjoyed writing and kept a motherhood blog, but had never dreamed of earning an income by stringing words together. One afternoon I happened across a group of women who were writers, and realized that there were unlimited opportunities for writers to earn an income.
Once I realized that I could work without setting foot inside an office, my life changed almost instantly. I grabbed at every writing opportunity that I could, hungry for success in this new role that I created for myself.
At the beginning of my new career I would wake up early and write until late at night. My children played around me; I learned to tune out the chaos and get my work done. My oldest daughter loved to hear the stories that I would write about her, and told her friends that she wanted to be a “Prelance Writer” like her mother.
It didn’t take long for me to realize that I needed a better system, so I enrolled my children in part-time daycare, and set a writing schedule that allowed me to work when my kids weren’t home, and enjoy my family when they were.
As soon as I started establishing a career in a field that I loved I noticed a shift in my self-esteem and enjoyment of life. I felt vibrant and alive, and it wasn’t just because I had extra money in the bank. There was a thrill from creating a life for myself, and not having a boss to answer to.
It’s been three years since I found my life calling, and I still can’t believe how lucky I am.
I know I’m not the only woman who found her ambition after having children. According to a 2017 study conducted by Accenture women are more ambitious post-children, and more entrepreneurial too.
Perhaps our ambition is an act of self-care, a piece of the puzzle that we find when we’ve become consumed by poopy diapers and park playdates. I think I found my confidence and ambition after having children because I finally saw how capable I was.
Post-motherhood I had carried children inside of me, and given birth despite my fears and reservations. I had endured sleepless nights and lonely days, and I had grown to love another human more than I thought possible. But these massive milestones also stirred within me the realization that I can do anything I set my mind to.
When I was 22 and newly laid off I felt like I had finally found my calling, and for a time I did. I know many of mothers who find complete fulfillment in full-time motherhood, and I think they’re wonderful mothers. For me, I became the mother I was meant to when I recognized my personal ambitions, and created a life for myself that I didn’t think was possible pre-kids.
Motherhood became a vehicle for discovering my potential, and realizing that I could reach for the stars.
Along the way, I learned that the stars are not as far as I thought they were.