There’s no denying that after you have a baby, a heck of a lot of stuff is happening. Your body is doing things it didn’t do before. You probably don’t look or feel like yourself. Hormones are raging. Not to mention the pressure to be good at everything. It’s no wonder that sometimes your relationship with your partner can be hard to maintain.
But we’re big believers in working on a healthy relationship, mainly because it’s good for you, Mama. It not only helps you feel like your old pre-baby self again, but we all need the support, love, and friendship we get from our partners.
Here are a few low-pressure, easy ways to help revitalize your relationship during the rough times.
Go for a hot tub
Or a walk. Or a coffee (we realize not everyone has a hot tub handy!) Just try doing something that involves a lot of you and your partner talking—and not much else. Communication is always a good thing. We’ve found the uninterrupted time alone in a hot tub (or on a walk or during a coffee date) is a great way to talk about everything and anything and remember why you love each other so much.
Try to get comfortable with the embarrassing body things
The truth is, most people have something new they don’t love about their bodies post-baby. So, if stretch marks, extra weight or even vaginal dryness are causing you to feel uncomfortable with intimacy, just know you’re not alone. It’s important to try and focus on all the good parts about yourself and remember that your partner most likely really and truly loves you for all of those things and more. They rarely notice stretch marks. But they always see you.
Treat the issues you can
Sex after baby can be… different. If you have a specific issue, like postpartum vaginal dryness (which is a common and natural condition), try to treat it. Vagisil® ProHydrate Natural Feel Lubricant and Moisturizing Gel relieves dryness and makes sex more comfortable. It has a blend of moisturizers, including Hyaluronic Acid —a naturally occurring hydrator found in skin—so it feels like your own natural moisture. Hormones, stress, pregnancy and IVF can all contribute to vaginal dryness. It’s not just an age-related issue. It’s completely normal and totally treatable—so there’s no sense in struggling with it if you don’t need to.
Don’t do a date night
Everyone seems to suggest date nights for couples, and while they’re great, sometimes that’s just not possible. Instead, why not plan a low-key evening together after the kids go to bed? Order takeout and watch Netflix on the couch, have a glass of wine or a beer on your patio. Just make it easy and all about the two of you.
Don’t worry too much about sex (for now)
It’s natural for intimacy to take a bit of a nosedive. It will get back to ‘normal’ eventually. But if you’re worried about it—try planning it out so it definitely happens. Choose a day for sex (like a Sunday; a great day to get stuff done and start the week right) if you’re a schedule type of a gal. Or, if possible, get a hotel room for a night. Make yourself comfortable—in your room, in your clothes, and try things like Vagisil® ProHydrate Natural Feel Lubricant and Moisturizing Gel for comfort on an on-going basis. Physical intimacy is key to a healthy relationship, so do your best to make it comfortable and fun again.
What else do you like to do to help bring the spark back? Let us know in the comments below!
Thanks to Vagisil for partnering with us on this post in order to help normalize and remove the stigma around vaginal health.